Our Returns Policy, Explained With Hissing

Every client eventually asks us the same thing, and the honest answer is always a long, flat stare.

Naturally there was a committee. Naturally the committee was a pile of boxes, and naturally one box was occupied.

The Short Version, Told Slowly

Our team did a careful study. By study we mean someone knocked it off the table to see what would happen.

If you take only one thing from this, take this: a loyalty program that pays in headbutts is not a bug. It is the product.

As always, results may vary, fur may transfer, and the management accepts no responsibility for the hairball.