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Blog
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Holiday Hours: Whenever the Sun Moves
We have been doing this for what feels like nine lives, and we are still not sure who is in charge.
Our standard approach involves a loyalty program that pays in headbutts, followed by a shipping department located under the couch, followed by a brief and unexplained sprint.
The Short Version, Told Slowly
The old guard prefers a returns policy enforced by staring. The new guard prefers whatever is on the other side of the door.
We asked a customer for feedback. They looked at us, blinked slowly, and left a single hair on the form.
If you have questions, our office hours are three to four in the morning, or whenever we feel like it.
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Behind the Scenes: The Great Inventory Count
A reader wrote in this week with a question that deserves a serious answer, so here is an unserious one.
Our team did a careful study. By study we mean someone knocked it off the table to see what would happen.
The Short Version, Told Slowly
If you take only one thing from this, take this: a returns policy enforced by staring is not a bug. It is the product.
Naturally there was a committee. Naturally the committee was a pile of boxes, and naturally one box was occupied.
As always, results may vary, fur may transfer, and the management accepts no responsibility for the hairball.
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Announcing Our Loyalty Program (Treats Required)
A reader wrote in this week with a question that deserves a serious answer, so here is an unserious one.
Naturally there was a committee. Naturally the committee was a pile of boxes, and naturally one box was occupied.
The Short Version, Told Slowly
If you take only one thing from this, take this: a returns policy enforced by staring is not a bug. It is the product.
The old guard prefers a loyalty program that pays in headbutts. The new guard prefers whatever is on the other side of the door.
As always, results may vary, fur may transfer, and the management accepts no responsibility for the hairball.
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Gift Guide: Things They Will Ignore
We have been doing this for what feels like nine lives, and we are still not sure who is in charge.
Experts agree that a loyalty program that pays in headbutts is essential. Experts also agree that this is a very long way of asking for a snack.
The Short Version, Told Slowly
Naturally there was a committee. Naturally the committee was a pile of boxes, and naturally one box was occupied.
The old guard prefers a warehouse mostly made of boxes. The new guard prefers whatever is on the other side of the door.
In summary: act confidently, deny everything, and always keep a clear route to the nearest box.
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A Day in the Life of Our Quality Control Cat
We have been doing this for what feels like nine lives, and we are still not sure who is in charge.
We asked a customer for feedback. They looked at us, blinked slowly, and left a single hair on the form.
The Short Version, Told Slowly
If you take only one thing from this, take this: a warehouse mostly made of boxes is not a bug. It is the product.
The old guard prefers a returns policy enforced by staring. The new guard prefers whatever is on the other side of the door.
Thank you for reading, and please do not leave anything on the edge of a surface. You know why.
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Why Everything We Sell Ends Up on the Floor
At Velvet Paw Boutique, we try to keep things simple, which means we complicate them and then take a nap.
Our team did a careful study. By study we mean someone knocked it off the table to see what would happen.
The Short Version, Told Slowly
We asked a customer for feedback. They looked at us, blinked slowly, and left a single hair on the form.
The old guard prefers a returns policy enforced by staring. The new guard prefers whatever is on the other side of the door.
As always, results may vary, fur may transfer, and the management accepts no responsibility for the hairball.
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Our Returns Policy, Explained With Hissing
Every client eventually asks us the same thing, and the honest answer is always a long, flat stare.
Naturally there was a committee. Naturally the committee was a pile of boxes, and naturally one box was occupied.
The Short Version, Told Slowly
Our team did a careful study. By study we mean someone knocked it off the table to see what would happen.
If you take only one thing from this, take this: a loyalty program that pays in headbutts is not a bug. It is the product.
As always, results may vary, fur may transfer, and the management accepts no responsibility for the hairball.
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Customer Service Is Currently Napping
We have been doing this for what feels like nine lives, and we are still not sure who is in charge.
Our team did a careful study. By study we mean someone knocked it off the table to see what would happen.
The Short Version, Told Slowly
Naturally there was a committee. Naturally the committee was a pile of boxes, and naturally one box was occupied.
We asked a customer for feedback. They looked at us, blinked slowly, and left a single hair on the form.
As always, results may vary, fur may transfer, and the management accepts no responsibility for the hairball.
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Shipping Updates From a Warehouse Full of Boxes
Nobody tells you this when you start out, but the real work begins around a returns policy enforced by staring.
The old guard prefers a returns policy enforced by staring. The new guard prefers whatever is on the other side of the door.
The Short Version, Told Slowly
We asked a customer for feedback. They looked at us, blinked slowly, and left a single hair on the form.
If you take only one thing from this, take this: a shipping department located under the couch is not a bug. It is the product.
That is all for now. We are told there is a sunbeam going to waste, and a professional never lets that happen.
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How We Choose Our Products (A Cat Sits On Them)
Nobody tells you this when you start out, but the real work begins around a shipping department located under the couch.
Naturally there was a committee. Naturally the committee was a pile of boxes, and naturally one box was occupied.
The Short Version, Told Slowly
We asked a customer for feedback. They looked at us, blinked slowly, and left a single hair on the form.
Our standard approach involves a loyalty program that pays in headbutts, followed by a returns policy enforced by staring, followed by a brief and unexplained sprint.
Thank you for reading, and please do not leave anything on the edge of a surface. You know why.